10 Things I Have Learned A Year After My Surgery
I can't believe it's has been a year since I had my surgery. Last Spring and Summer was one of the toughest times I have ever had to face! During that time, I really didn't think I would make it through. I had surgery last year to remove a tumour from my uterus. If you want to read about my experience, go here! But, it has now been a year and here are the ten things that I have learnt.
1. What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger: This is something that is said and it is so true. There were moments after my surgery where I felt like I wouldn't and couldn't make it through. After the surgery, walking, peeing, standing, coughing, and sneezing would hurt so much. These were simple things that never used to hurt. But after the surgery, I feel much stronger. I can say this after year and it has been a long journey up to this point of strength.
2. Your Body Is A Wonderland: The body is an amazing thing. It is so weird how your own body can attack you and yet heal you. It literally blows my mind when I think about. It's amazing how weak you can feel one moment and then how strong you can feel the next. It's amazing that your body can be cut open by a doctor and then be sewn back together again. The body is a wonderland.
3. Recovery Is A Bitch: Recovery is hard, it is harder than the surgery. It is mentally exhausting and emotionally exhausting. Recovery is a process that takes months and sometimes years. I'm still recovering, my body is still healing.
4. Drugs Are Everything: After my surgery, I totally understand the power of drugs and I am so thankful for them. There is nothing like being cut open for you to realize that drugs are amazing. Whether it was the stool softener, or the extra strength Tylenol, or something stronger like Percocet, these drugs really helped me during the first two weeks after my surgery. P.s, don't take drugs that are not prescribed to you.
5. Friends Are Everything: My friends really helped me through my surgery and I am so thankful for them. Many of them called, visited, and helped me through the first couple weeks after my surgery.
6. Moments Of Impact: For me, the most amazing moments after my surgery came two months later. Since the surgery was on my uterus, it took awhile for my period to come back. My doctor and I were waiting to see how that first period would be. Before the surgery, my period was a horror show, it was heavy and so painful. After the surgery, my period is much better. I have heavy days, but they aren't as heavy as before. For example I would go through 10 to 12 pads in my first day and like 6 on the second. Now, the first day and second day, I go through maybe 9 pads or less and after that I wear panty liners for the rest of my period. That was a moment of impact for me, because I would use 20 pads before the surgery and now I use half of that. My period is also not painful at all. Before it felt like my uterus would fall out, now it is just a slight ache that goes away with Advil. Another moment of impact is peeing. When the tumour was at its biggest, it was the size of a six month old fetus (lol I know, it was ridiculous). At that size, it was pressing against my bladder, so, I couldn't pee or I couldn't hold in my pee. Now, every time I go to the bathroom, I am taken back by the gift of being able to pee and not have to struggle. As I said before the body is a wonderland.
7. The Fear Never Goes Away: I still worry that the fibroid will come back. Going in I was told that there was a possibility that it might return. But, I know I have done this once and I can do it again!
8. You Are Empowered: I felt so weak and defeated the days following my surgery. I felt scared and powerless. Most of all, I felt vulnerable, which I have to admit, I really disliked. It was both the feeling of being mentally, emotionally, and physically powerless. It took me a whole year to deal with all of the issues that came up after my surgery. Now, I feel empowered from everything I have learnt and it is amazing.
9. Acceptance Is Everything: I had to accept my body when I had the tumour and I have learnt to accept it without it. Learning to love yourself is so tough. It is an on going process that takes months and some times years. But it is important to accept what was, what is, and what will be.
10. This Too Shall Pass: This saying is one of my favorites. Nothing lasts forever. The pain doesn't last forever, the fear, the illness, the strength, or the weakness. Everything comes and goes, it all passes and that is the best part. When I was in the thick of it, when I was in pain and afraid, I literally thought that it would never end. Now looking back, I realize how silly it was to think it would last forever. Alway remember wherever you are in life, especially if its a very difficult time in your life that "this too shall pass". It always does.
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*Originally published On April 2017*